If you realize just what I had realized

I feel like crap.

I figured I was doing the right thing. I thought I had done a good deed when I helped him with getting her address and everything. It wasn't because of him and it definitely wasn't because of her as much as I want it to appear so.

I can never lie to myself even if I keep telling myself that I was doing it for either of them. I know it well in my heart that it was because of myself I had so eagerly aided him.

For the whole time, I've felt like I was the selfish reason that held them back. He was all I ever wanted and she was afraid to hurt me. They could have been something. Something beautiful - if it weren't for me.

I want them to know that they have my blessings and I sincerely wish the best for the two of them. I want to stop feeling like the selfish reason.

However, it's far too late. People often move on and feelings tend to fade. And for what I had thought was the right thing to do is going to cause more pain and misery.

I still feel like the selfish reason.. Only worse now.